Wilbrod the Gnome

When Weight Can Land You in Jail.

2012-01-10T11:45:00.000-08:00

The Royal Society for Protection of Animals prosecuted two brothers owning a loved, 11-year old rottweiler (which is pretty old!) for animal cruelty because their dog was grossly overweight.

An Englishwoman who had a very old german shepherd who was underweight spent a lot of money to fight a case prosecuted by the Royal Society for Protection of Animals for animal cruelty because her dog was "in lean condition."

The case was thrown out in court, because the RSPCA had not properly disclosed documents that undermined their case completely and worked from the wrong case file for another dog altogether. Turns out their case was lousy. If the woman hadn't spent money to fight it, she could have been convicted based on lies. The case reports involves some interesting judge's findings on the problems of "imposing an uniform standard of care."

He also objects to stigmatizing defendants by implying they are also likely to abuse children. This link is most likely only when pets are assaulted by domestic abusers in a fit of rage.

Many prosecutions for animal cruelty involve lack of veterinary care, neglect, which active malice need not exist.

Let us take a hypothetical example. A woman who owns a dog or other pet, always has taken care of it. One day, she gets in an accident when coming home and falls into a coma or undergoes emergency surgery and is out of it for over a day or four. This happens to thousands a year.

She has no family and nobody to check on her dog, and it is a few days before she recovers. Meanwhile the dog is at home, unable to be let out or taken care of. The neighbors may act IF they know she hasn't come home yet and they've been entrusted to take of her dog before. If not, the dog could well starve and foul the home while the owner is in a coma. When the investigators come, they see the animal frantic from hunger and anxiety and a mess everywhere. It doesn't look nice, does it?
By a "strict objective standard of care" as the RSPCA advocates, the woman should be arrested for neglect or felony animal cruelty because she was hit by a car and was NOT able to take care of her pet.

People who find a starving stray dog and nurse it back to health can be prosecuted and targeted for having obviously ill or underweight dogs that have been poorly taken care of-- never mind the person just found the dog and has taken it to a vet already. You see, the person is in the possession of an obviously maltreated animal, ergo the person is guilty of abusing it.

If you think this happens only in England, you're wrong. Animal Control Officers (who often have no law OR veterinary training whatsoever) will prosecute owners for apparent cases of cruelty.

Imagine you're walking and talking with your friend in a wheelchair after a severe car accident. He has a black eye, broken limbs, etc. Would you like to be immediately suspected of assaulting your friend without any proof or questions asked? Of course not! When it is a human involved, people ask "What happened?!"

We need to get back to that "What happened?!" attitude when we see hurt and sick animals. Often the story isn't what you might think it is.

This explanation of rights that the RSPCA do and do NOT have are also fairly applicable to Americans and any agencies seeking to prosecute for animal cruelty. Under the law, NOBODY can enter your property for a search and seizure without your permission without a warrant. DO not give this permission.

Private agencies like the RSPCA, ASPCA, or others MUST get a warrant from court, and even then they are not authorized enter your property without your permission or the presence of law personnel. They are private citizens, not officers of the law. They need a court order to gain access, not a warrant.
If they come waiving a warrant but without law officers, insist on reading it and make sure they WAIT for law officers to get there.

The ADA Restoration Act: What's the fuss?

2012-01-10T11:44:00.000-08:00

Why do we need a new law to restore the Americans with Disabilities Act? Here's Senator Harkin's words on this:

"Unfortunately, since the ADA was passed, a series of court decisions have ignored Congress’ clear intent regarding who should be protected under the law, and have narrowed the category of who qualifies as an “individual with a disability.”

“Many individuals who Congress intended to protect under the ADA – including people with epilepsy, diabetes, and cancer – are no longer protected as a result of these court decisions,” said Harkin. “These cases have created a bizarre catch-22 where people with serious conditions like epilepsy or diabetes could be forced to choose between treating their conditions and forfeiting their protections under the ADA, or not treating their conditions and being protected. That is not what Congress intended when we passed this law 17 years ago. This situation clearly cries out for a modest, reasonable legislative fix, and that's exactly what I am doing, today, by introducing the ADA Restoration Act of 2007.”

The law has been interpreted to mean that you are not covered if you aren't disabled, leading to such controversial rulings such as Kirkingburg v. Albertson's Inc. The original judge said basically, Mr. Kirkingburg could be an "individual with a disability" in other lawsuits, but not in this particular case, because of existing federal law. It has been overturned on appeal.

The ADA restoration act would change the word to prohibit discrimination on the BASIS of disability, just as discrimination is now prohibited on the basis of gender, age, sexual orientation, or race. You don't have to prove you're a certain color even under a bright light in order to prove racial discrimination, and so it should be with discrimination on the basis of disability.

Properly written and clarified to businesses, with guidelines on what is safe and not safe to do, this may help employment potential. This clarity was missing with the first ADA. Many businesses fired their disabled employees when the ADA was about to pass for fear of lawsuits and increased costs. Employment for the disabled has NOT improved since the ADA.

The Federal Aviatian Administration (FAA) gave airlines clear guidelines about how to accomodate disabled fliers, and for the large majority disabled flyers find airports amazingly much more accessible than before the ADA (although discrimination still exists.)

Yet the average employer has no such resource, other than what case law involving the ADA has stated. Business briefs published by the U.S. Department of Justice involve accomodations, customer service, but not much on advertising, hiring and firing practices to avoid discrimination.

The closest non-disabled example of discrimination in hiring against the disabled would be for women of a certain age who arouse the covert fear that "they could get pregnant and leave after they've used up their employer-paid family leave", and same goes for older people who might be in worse health, but women face fewer obstacles to employment in the first place that disabled people do.

Despite the paranoia of some die-hard critics, The ADA does and the ADA restoration act would actually allow business to fire people for not doing work they were paid to do, whether disabled or not, or to simply reduce hours if the employee is not able to work full-time, without fear of a lawsuit related to the fact they're disabled.

Alas, employer-paid health insurance is unfortunately the major elephant in the room when it comes to discrimination against current employees. Businesses can't always afford to pay health insurance for part-time employees, but if they cut benefits due to disability causing reduced hours, they wind up risking lawsuits or paying health insurance for disabled employees and not healthy employees, and risking a lawsuit all around.

In a way, this is why the COBRA act was passed-- to obligate businesses to allow people to buy-in their health plans after termination of employment, or reduction in hours worked-- but without having to make the business chip in as well.

The Family and Medical Leave Act also protects employees' rights in case of emergency, and actually restricts the leave taken due to disability or family situations to 12 weeks (3 months). This may be paid or unpaid, or a combination of both. The employer is not obligated to pay it. Some might argue that Europe has a better model. However, COBRA is flat and includes disablity in its definition.

Interestingly, many websites (here's one!) talking about life after being laid-off suggest that if you're healthy, find a better plan. If you're ill, stay with COBRA... because of the problems of being rejected by new insurance policies. (Don't believe that one? Here's another with the same advice.)

So benefits, once intended to entice workers, now have become a fixed cost of employment that is nearly the same for the CEO and the mailboy. This massive obligation is fraught with continuing costs as the cost of health insurance spirals upwards out of the reach of average people without employer clout in getting group plans. That mean employees MUST hold out for benefits from employers, and often stay for the sake of benefits. Because larger businesses can get health insurance cheaper in bulk, they have an overhead advantage to smaller business. This MUST be changed for the sake of both businesses and employees alike.

The disproportionate, fixed costs of employing people full-time with benefits drives employers to hire 2-3 people part times, no benefits. In some areas (such as here), people may work 2-3 part-time jobs without benefits, when the business could likely provide full-time jobs... if they could afford the benefits.

Sadly, there are no part-time CEO jobs. The part-time jobs without benefits are generally the jobs that pay moderately or poorly to start with. Also, there's the family restriction on health insurance group plans, which means your friend, roommate, or sibling can't add you to his health plan for you while you're out of work or not getting benefits! Only your spouse can do that... if he/she has insurance.

If you're fostering a child, you probably can't add him to your health insurance, either. Thankfully, since 1999, foster children have Medicaid until age 21.

Employer-paid health insurance is not a benefit that is not equal for single people versus people with spouses or kids then. Because the employer pays part of the insurance for every person on the plan, we would expect some discrimination against parents, as well. And we do. So, employment discrimination can be based on many factors, including health insurance costs, as well as a perceived higher risk of being sued without cause. Doesn't make it right in any case.

When discrimation in hiring affects the bottom line, I fear that anti-discrimination laws will only work when employers are sued into compliance... or they are shown how their fears aren't true, and taught their rights in this case. A third path, that of meditating employment disputes, also depends on well-trained meditators.

The ADA restoration act will make it easier for us to sue for employment discrimination under the correct wording of the law. Business however need guidelines on how not to discriminate without bending over backwards inappropriately. Nobody should keep an employee just because they're fearful of a lawsuit and then use it as an excuse not to hire qualified people in the future. That means doing it right in the first place!

I get upset when businesses refuse to hire employees because of disability issues, qualifications aside. This is the WORST discrimination out there right now.

I've had people be rude to me and say "we don't want you, you're deaf." Well, they just wanted me a minute ago when they left me a voice message or e-mail after seeing my resume and I answered exactly what I could do per the job ad.

The ADA says I don't have to disclose my disability at any point, even when I am hired. Experience has taught me that I shouldn't allow employers the opportunity to discriminate before I get a foot in the door.

On your resume you shouldn't put any information (about gender, age, sexual orientation, martial status) that could lead to discrimination. It is also illegal for employers to ask for this information up front because they can use it to discriminate against you before even meeting you. Disabled people merit the same protection.

I've learned that I don't get callbacks if I tell people to use the relay. So voice mail it is for me. I've gotten a few interviews that way by calling THEM back via relay and talking to them first.

One manager said "you can't do this job" and when I asked why, began making excuses, lying about the job description which suddenly was nothing like what was written down on the job ad in front of me. She then wanted to revoke the interview which she had already offered to me on the voice mail.
I filed an complaint with the president of that company, explaining the situation and saying, whether the job ad was incorrect or the manager was lying, there was a significant problem here that should be fixed.

Many job ads specify "verbal or oral communication skills"-- which to to many is code for "deaf, stutterers, extremely shy, autistic, or other communication disorders need not apply." Sadly, it's not even true in all cases.

I once applied for a job that demanded oral communication, said so in the ad. I really wanted that job, and the ad didn't make it clear WHY. I applied for the job. They hired me-- there was nearly zero communication that couldn't be done by e-mail, except for meetings. It was one of the most quiet places I had ever worked in.

Now, whether intended or not, asking for physical, speech, mental or sensory requirements that are not key to the job is discriminatory. Key tasks should be part of the job information.

A business needs to be clear about the job they're advertising or they won't get good core skill fits. We shouldn't allow the trend of discrimination in advertising and interviewing for jobs to continue unchecked. It is a crime against us all.

All would-be recruiters and HR employees should try it from the other side: send out two similar resumes. Have a disabled and a nondisabled person phone the company, record or listen in the conversation. See how the callback goes, and/or the interview. Try with another disability, and so on.

Maybe we'll all learn something together about why the disabled aren't employed enough, despite all the laws out there. 66% unemployed is a really high rate.

Many disabled people start their own businesses of some sort. It's not for everybody, but if you're ever interested, The Small Business Association has information on how to do so.

Knowing what you don't know...

2012-01-10T11:43:00.001-08:00

Every creature must know when they need to explore, to check out what is out there, when they don't have what it takes to do a death-defying leap quite yet.
But do most creatures stop and scratch their head before deciding whether they can do a task or not? Turns out self-reflection can be found in rats deciding whether they have the stuff it takes to do a test.

O Sweet Memory!

2012-01-10T11:43:00.000-08:00

As banana bread odor wafts past my nose, I am reminded of many things. Unlike Proust, the infamous author of "Remembrance of Times Past" though, I do not plan to write thousands of pages on my memories.

People have known for some time that smell has a peculiar link to memory. When we sniff something, we can often conjure up the episode when we last smelt that smell, including how we felt. Also in Korsakoff's syndrome, olfactory memory seems oddly untouched by thiamine deficiency.

We also literally smell with our brains, so perhaps this is not all that surprising. The amylagda, important in fear/anger response, also receives inputs directly from the olfactory bulb and helps form emotional reactions to odors.

Therefore, you will never catch yourself thinking wistfully "that smell smells rather odd, kind of like eggs that's gone rotten, what should I do?" Instead you'll be screaming "AHHHHHH ROTTEN EGG ODOR, GET OUT OF HERE" and leaving in time to avoid inhaling lethal amounts of hydrogen sulfide. Or to avoid ingesting more of rotting food. And so on.

Rats have been shown to only need 1-2 trials to learn to associate a smell with an experience. Dogs have been shown to have much keener smell-memory of people after 1-2 exposures than people have of people's appearance, and be much more reliable about it.
Dogs in fact can discriminate between different body parts of people; most "mistakes in identification" appear to be from the dog not having smelled enough to make a match to the person. They almost never make false matches.

Now, a recent issue in Science mentions that if you are exposed to a smell while learning a task, and then later smell that during slow-wave sleep, you can remember the tasks MUCH better. This is interesting.

Mice have a stronger sense of smell at night, thanks to their circadian rhythms . But they are nocturnal animals that are normally awake at night. We don't know when our sense of smell is most acute, although hordes of pregnant women would probably personally vote for early to mid morning. Gack.

From Russia with Gimbels and Awe

2008-12-23T08:29:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas to y'all. I was about ready to let this blog fold as I have so much other writing to do, but I could not resist sharing this amazing video (on Windows Media Player) of a Russian SU-30MK fighter jet.

The pink smoke is to show any vortex formation around the wingtips-- vortexes forming over wings are bad news for flight stability. Pretty, eh? You can see the smoke changes angles, as does the plane ITSELF when flying. This fighter jet has vectored thrust, using nozzles that can change direction of thrust.

This ain't anywhere near my field of expertise, so I wound up knocking at NASA's website on gimbaled thrust, for further info on how you get moveable nozzles. Gimbals are found in gyroscopes and other systems, and have their flaws (especially in the 3-gimbal style).

If you still haven't gotten enough of those bad boys, check out this YouTube video set to Metallica-- at around 0:29 you will get to see a SU-37 waggle its gimbled nozzles before takeoff.

-Wilbrod-

Happy Hacking Days!

2007-12-19T18:31:00.000-08:00

A case of bronchitis has me housebound and seriously burning up with cabin fever. So I'm expanding my computer skills a little. Somebody told me GIMP (GUI manipulation program) could be used to make animated gifs.

With help from a fellow blogger, I also figured out why Blogger wouldn't animate the gifs. Apparently, blogger copies and displays a trimmed version of the picture, not the original. The solution was to link to the picture instead. I opened a photobucket album.

Once I was all set to blog, I needed a better demo. This picture
took me around 15 seconds to create this from two pre-existing pictures, including flipping one into its mirror image with GIMP to create a third image. Now you know why those annoying animations are everywhere.... grin.

Can I make the picture stop moving? Voila! Hmm, I have only an option between "loop forever" and a single cycle. Bites. That can't be right; I did better on Visual Basic 10 years ago.

Looks like I could always duplicate it a few times for a longer animation cycle. That would mean more memory for the same stuff, and that's a total waste of broadband. I don't like it. Time to get more GIMP-savvy and see if I can do advanced settings instead.

This is all part of my mad plan, of course. Today, a simple little licky bear face; tomorrow it shall be animated diagrams bringing Pulsating Science to a Computer Near You. Well maybe not tomorrow; but as soon as I get all sciency-bloggy again, I promise you, I'll also be GIMPy. Or something.

In the meanwhile, here's a hot review of a 71-year old guy who is a YouTube superstar for his amazing lectures/demos on physics at the Massaschusetts Institute of Technology.

MIT has open courseware of various lectures for all to enjoy. You can download them; MIT even allows you to translate them into the language of your choice, as long as you identify their source. Therefore, those videos can be copied and captioned for the benefit of the hearing-impaired.

I understand various video editing softwares can make captioning relatively simple, but I'm not very savvy on video editing-- yet. Google has some information here, as well as instructions for how to subtitle your google video uploads.

Unfortunately Youtube, while popular, still stinks at its captioning features, according to this blog's review.

So... will we have captioned MIT open courseware for the deaf soon?

-Wilbrod-

Reload that magazine for me, please...

2007-08-18T16:59:00.000-07:00

I grew up subscribing to science magazines. The idea of reading fiction in magazines was alien to me, except for the usual "ELVIS FATHERED MY 3-HEADED ALIEN BABY!" titles that I inched away from in the supermarkets.

Now, I'm looking to broaden my magazine tastes. Enter the internet-- many magazines have websites with covers, table of contents, and samples of their issues. So I went a-browsing, and I turned up two gems thus far.

One is Image magazine, which advertises itself as "art, faith, and mystery". It's challenging to pigeonhole what it IS. But I found some good stuff in it, such as this poignant essay, "The Fifth Chair" by Mary Swander. Still, I don't always want serious reading.

This poem was a nice change and very hip.

I also found this blog which discusses writing as a form of healing. Very interesting!

To that article, I would add that writers should never forget to take their daily dose of laughter while writing for therapy, as well.

O Midsummer!

2007-06-20T13:12:00.000-07:00

As benefits a good gnome, I have been trying to master the rudiments of knitting. I just got shown the basic "casting on" stitch around 50 times before I finally realized I kept doing some moves in the opposite direction than I should. Who would have guessed I have knitting dyslexia? Ah well. It's safer to be confused on up and down when knitting than when flying.

I'll eventually learn knitting somehow and then watch those needles smoke... and if I don't, these needles will DEFINITELY go up in smoke.

I was told that in ye old gnomish pioneering days, when sheep were more plentiful than clothes stores, that every gnomelet would be expected to practice knitting for 2 hours an evening until they either poked their eyes out with needles or got that Phygrian cap just right. I guess it was prehistoric Nintendo.

Nowadays they're thinking kids don't know how to go outside anymore-- thanks to the siren song of the computer. Someday we'll MAKE computers be good camping buddies and have tactile interfaces to teach us to knit and start fires, In the meanwhile I say pack those spoiled brats off to camp-- you know, no e-mail, no cell phones, and all.

Until then, I'll keep unhooking myself from cyberlife to enjoy the Great Outdoors with Wilbrodog.

I live in an area with some risk of Lyme disease if you get bit by deer ticks. I've caught 2 crawling up my arm and removed them before they could bite. Just a word of warning, try not to handle ticks directly. Even if lyme disease is not epidemic in your area, Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever and other tick-borne diseases may exist instead. Vaccines are being worked on for those.

But heck, life isn't meant to be safe-- it's meant to be lived. Just pay attention to any hitchhikers on you and your pets that are NOT carrying towels.

Otherwise, I like this place in summer a lot. Today, at the summer solistice, the sun rises shortly after 5 AM and sets at around 9:30 PM. Now that's what I call a LONG day-- more than 16 hours of sunshine!

And it's time for me to unplug and go and enjoy me this midsummer day. I am not allowed to indulge the gnomish rituals of midsummer, but here are some ideas for celebrating the outdoors.

Don't forget to take your knitting along.

-- Wilbrod the Gnome

BTW, hope you like the updated pic of me to the side. Spiffy for a gnome, eh?

Reeling, Writhing and Fainting in Coils... in Sign?

2007-04-14T16:48:00.000-07:00

... As Lewis Carroll wrote, the Mock Turtle Academy teaches those three subjects, as well as the major branches of Arithmetics-- Ambition, Distraction, Uglification and Derision. My childhood is long past, yet I still smile at those puns.

Play with words helps learning. Interestingly, pretend play can help with the development of reading skills. This link is about as readable as mud, but the bottom line is, imaginative play helps develop the language skills needed for reading.

Daily, it is easier to reply on environmental cues to communicate what "give me that" means. But the rules in pretend games are different! You have to communicate more clearly-- "give me the glass of lemonade you have in your hand." The ability to construct a story is very important for reading, as well.

Studies on language and our short-term memory indicates we only have so much memory for a chain of nonsense words-- from a low of 3 to a best of 7 on average. We need to chunk words and ideas into bigger concepts that we then memorize in order. By this chunking process, a person can memorize Pi to ten thousand digits, as a series of phone numbers, whatever... and then on demand, reel it all out. Amazing! That's REAL reeling.

When a child is struggling with reading words, the words themselves need to make sense, and the child be able to recognize chunks. The whole sentence needs to be understood, too, and the understanding comes from building a mental storyline in your head of the sentence.

Man bites dog. (Latin: Canem homo mordit)
Dog bites man. (Latin: Canis homem mordit)

Read right, these sentences give very different ideas of what's happening.
Here's the question: how does the reader or language speaker learn to recognize the difference between the two sentences? No 2-year old endures daily language drills to learn grammar.

Kids learn by example, repetition, looking for patterns. And they often get it wrong now and then on the way as they learn language.

By age 3-6, a child will start doing wordplay such as:
Rhymes: recognizing how words sound
Tongue-twisters: pronouncing similar words
Jokes based on simple puns
Repetition of words in songs, especially culmulative songs

Culmulative songs especially may test and develop memory strongly.

When the kids begin reading, and they can be introduced to wordplay on paper-- rebuses, "wacky words", which can help teach idiomatic language. This is the timetable for children growing up with spoken languages, of course.

ASL
The pattern with sign language is slightly different. Kids can learn to sign clearly sooner, but will otherwise develop grammatically on schedule similar to hearing children.

Older kids may do the following games in American sign language (ASL):
ABC or number stories, using different handshapes-- like acrostics in English.
Bilingual word play== "I understand" (I STAND (under))
Play on mistranslation of homonyms-- RIGHT as (correct, righthand, legal rights)

There are not many "fingertwisters" told using the same hand signs as they are easier in ASL.

My personal favorite example of a true finger-twister is: "Silly yellow dutch pipe cow phone." This will truly make your wrist writhe as you spell it.

Another type of fingertwister is when the signer attempts to sign two different simple words at the same time, such as DOG/CAT... and then try and speed it up to normal fingerspelling levels. This will make your mind reel-- it's impossible without a lobotomy.

Another game in sign language might be "Mirror sign" in which two hands will fingerspell or do signs in unison, facing each other, as in a mirror. This is easy to sign, but challenging for others to read.

And of course, ASL signers can do visual word play in English by moving their hands as they fingerspell. Many "loan words" in ASL incorporate movement.

A simple example: "B-a-c-k" is often signed rapidly as "B-ck" and the direction of movement will show the meaning-- "back to me", "back to you", etc.

Many ASL signers will spontaneously show diacritical marks (`' ~^ over letters) as movement in the letters themselves.
Therefore an ô will bounce, an ì will slope downwards, an Ä will be signed "A " rapidly followed by a crooked V stabbing the dots over it. An Ç will be a C moving down in a short J.

Apostrophes such as in "C'est" will be spelled as a twisting C followed by EST as the C handshape is used to paint the apostrophe. The exception may be for "O'" in Irish names where the O may move in a circle before moving to the next letter.

Now, in comparsion to painting French punctuation in the air while spelling the words, "FAINTING" in coils is easy.

Now you can see why I enjoy Lewis Carroll.

I am curious, though-- where are the memory games in sign language? There is no precise parallel to culmulative songs in ASL. Echolalia does not count. But wait a minute, culmulative songs can be done in turn, with each new signer contributing a verse in logical order.

This makes it similar to an ASL-story around, also known as a round-robin story. This does test listening memory and the ability to keep a story going. Also, many people can tell you that inventing, memorizing, and performing an ABC story is challenging to the memory.

Round robin stories were in fashion among educated Victorians during the 19th century, when ASL had its strongest development period before the Milan Congress in 1880.

However, among the hearing, culmative songs can be played as a memory game if the person is required to repeat what others have already said before adding a new verse.

I have not seen a ASL Round-robin story played this way. I would be interested to know if anybody has in fact played a round-robin story like this.

I think I have seen ABC stories done like a culmative song, as one narrator gets stuck on an letter and another child repeats the ABC story and tries to devise a new letter.

What are your favorite word games from a child?

Gesturing with your voice?

2007-03-09T20:11:00.000-08:00

Scientists are unearthing "verbal gestures"-- changes in pitch, speed that help convey emotion and also movement. Also, a deep voice helps with for male hierarchy stuff, like dominance. If you sound big, you probably ARE big.

Also, vision and sound may work together very closely. Although, after reading this article, I must comment that anybody who can't find rhythm in dancing even with the sound off probably is so tone-deaf they can't keep time.

The subject of sound playing a role in animal communication is a fascinating subject, and I recommend "Animal Talk" by Tim Friend which covers sound, vision, electric signals, touch, smell, etc. It is a wonderful effort to condense the research for the lay public. I had so many questions after reading about acoustic communication.
For instance, the clicker is promoted as a "neutral" sound for dog training but I always doubted this, just from watching how my mom reacted to my playing with a cricket-type clicker once (she nearly strangled me). The information Tim Friend covers about short, sharp and abrupt sounds strongly supports my doubts that the clicker is that "neutral" to the ears.

I'm now reading Musicophilia by Oliver Sacks and I'm finding it really interesting reading; Oliver Sacks is a neurologist and he covers all the facets of music, including hearing music, hallucinating music, so he also covers a lot about deafness (and not just Beethoven). It seems many late-deafened deaf people often hallucinate music as their hearing goes. He also covers how partial hearing loss can affect enjoyment of music. And for the normal-eared folks, an overview of tune cooties or earworms is interesting, although perhaps not quite what some readers were expecting.
Oliver Sacks tends to think this is primarily music-oriented although he mentions poetry can sometimes do the same effect. This research indicates though, that the lyrics are often the focus of why the tune cootie sticks in the mind. I know myself I can wake up with a silly phrase I read somewhere stuck in my head; often poetic or just unusual in its phrasing.

Oliver Sacks talks about how music seems unreleated to the real world.

Ah, Tim Friend would disagree; he writes at length in his "Animal Talk" about how animals in dense forest use sound to communicate, find food, and even orient themselves-- every inch of forest can sound uniquely different because of the different mix of plants, and he points out that orchestral music may mimic the complex chorus of the rainforest. If you want to know the true origins of music's appeal, Tim Friend's book is it.

Jet man soarin' over the Alps

2007-03-05T20:23:00.000-08:00

Apparently manned, winged flight without the use of wheels, tails, and body has been accomplished by the Swiss Jet Man.

If you don't understand French, then instead just look at this video at YouTube. Here is a news release on this flight in Bex, Switzerland .

Some of us would think more of the Jetsons with these cartoon jetpacks, rather than Icarus. Jet packs to propel humans have been worked on since WWII. But these lacked wings.

First off, I'm pretty impressed by this man's guts, and I'm also very glad I don't have to see those guts splattered on video as well. But then, Yves Rossy has had Top Gun military pilot training in Switzerland. Given how small Switzerland is, it's tough work flying inside their air space, so you know he has to be GOOD.

Let's analyze all the factors in why he's not a smear on the ground or plastered on a mountainside like Wiley E. Coyote. It's not just having "The Right Stuff" and good aerodynamics. Remember, the human body is NOT designed for flight.

The most important thing: the landing. For his first flight, he plays it smart. He launches off an airplane so he has time to get everything working. Second, he wears a parachute in case things go wrong. Very sensible. He uses it to help brake for a safe landing without dropping like a rock. You can still see that he has to bend his legs considerably on the landing.

That must take skydiving practice. However this still looks like a good way to bust a leg if you don't extend your landing gear correctly; although who knows, properly designed crutches may turn out to be great landing gear after all.

Right now, most of us plebian fliers would have to make do with barf bags as parachutes in case of engine malfunction, so I'm somewhat jealous. Shoot, I want a 'chute next time I fly.

One downside that I see-- those wings are like chopped red toy airplane wings from an airplane ride, they wouldn't give even a fifth of the lift of a hang glider, no way. So, the jets are what keep him in the sky. That means a lot of acceleration. And speed. In fact, his cruising speed was 115 MPH-- very respectable. Small airplanes have a maximum cruising speed of roughly 120-200 MPH to my knowledge.

So, just thinking about that speed, you want to be wearing an overall, not any kind of clothing held up by waistbands or belts alone. In fact, he's wearing a flight outfit with gloves and all.

As you may know, air gets colder the further you go up-- adibatic cooling. In the video, you can see the Alps have scanty snow, suggesting it might be close to the freezing point. Now, add a 115 MPH (or so) wind chill to that, and you definitely would not want to streak across the sky like a streaking nude.

Clouds, being icy water vapor and dust also make very chilly clothing for the accidental aeronautic ecdysiast. There will never be a Mile-High Club on winged jet packs, then. For which we must be grateful.

I will also add that ice easily forms on wings, which can lead to crashing. For this reason, he probably also made the decision to avoid flying through clouds.

Yves aborted his flight shortly after encountering turbulence. Now, imagine turbulence on the unprotected human body. Turbulence is basically felt as irregular forces, experienced as a "bumpy ride" on a plane. Even if the "bumps" weren't hard enough to cause bruises, they can cause blood pressure changes in different parts of the body. Combine that with the vibration from the jet packs, and you could have a bad case of airsick even for the toughest pilots.

And who wants to be airsick in a helmet and splatter your visor when you're the only one flying the blasted thing? Or worse, knock yourself upside down or sideways before or AFTER you throw up?

Studies have shown that even the best pilots can't really judge if they're completely right way up by feel alone or their vestibular system without being able to see the horizon or use instruments-- and that's before any airsickness going on.

An experienced pilot always knows his limits. We hope.

After all, common sense says this has to be more dangerous than hang gliding.

Other than that, it appears he has two ways to control this jet pack: One, he can change his center of gravity by moving his legs and body up and down, and two, he can manipulate the the flaps on his wings to create drag and turn the aircraft, That must be really cool. It's much more like what a bird can do, but not quite-- more wing control and flexibility is called for.

Yves Rossy has done an amazing thing in doing what he did. However, I hope he will go back to the drawing board for his wings and perhaps add aerodynamic body armor of some sorts. But he's probably happy he got it done on whatever budget he had. And lived with both legs intact.

I admit, I hope the next model will be painted black and yellow and called "The Bumblebee" in French.

- Wilbrod the Gnome.

Boyd's Last Briefing

2007-01-11T09:55:00.000-08:00

An amateur military historian showed me this link to Boyd's last briefing, a presentation made by the military strategist Col. John Boyd of the U.S. Air Force. This concise briefing covers warfare strategy from ancient times through WWII.

Byrd also introduces the "Observe, Orient, Decide, Action time" loop that is key to the enemy's response to any strategy. It is worthwhile reading by anybody interested in military history in any era, whether the war was well-fought or not.

Interestingly, he combined concepts from physics and mathematics as axioms-- entropy, uncertainty, etc. He helped design the tactics for the First Gulf War, which lead to the mass surrender of the Iraqi army.

He also used a concept of natural selection which is not well explained, but goes to the basic need for survival and the drive to keep as many chances to survive open, from food acquistion, trust of others, etc. "Natural selection" has often acquired an idiomatic cultural meaning that is totally distinct from the Darwinistic sense.

Perhaps "The Red Queen's Race" is more apt. That every survival strategy is always in a race against opposing strategies is indeniable. Any kind of survival strategy must be flexible, ever-changing, and never stationary or it will be exploited by disease, predators, etc. (This concept also recurred in a popular motivational book called "Who moved my cheese?", which is kind of... cheesy.)

Boyd approaches war strategy as survival strategy, period. The enemy must never have time to adapt to the opposing strategy. The enemy must be demoralized and ready to surrender rather than fight you. Resistance must not continually breed itself from the resentment of the people. That is the surest way.

This 1976 paper lays out his concepts of the laws of nature as applied to war. Everything destroys itself in part or in whole to re-create itself. Nothing is fixed and certain. They cannot be, by the laws of physics. Couched in the language of math and physics, it still sounds Taoistic. This makes me wonder if Col. Boyd had read the "Tao of Physics". Certainly he would have been aware of this book as it was written in 1975 and became a bestseller. He would have wanted to explore the connection between Taoism and Sun Tzu's Art of War.

Dawkins once spoke of cultural ideas as "genes" which he called memes, which mutate and adapt as they spread, and are subject to pressures from the real world, as well. Boyd's last Briefing is a nice example of the memes of war, but what interests me even more is how he incorporates memes from so many sources in his analysis.

When tracking down those memes, I also learned about Heraclitus of Ephesus, a Greek philosopher who had a Tao-like philosophy and who directly influenced Socrates and Plato. His comments have become memes, as well. "Everything flows." "You can't step in the same river twice."

Boyd's take-home message: Adapt, never hold still, fight the enemy that exists, not the enemy you wish you had. Holding the course and using predictable tactics will lead to failure.

We shouldn't ignore the guy who did help engineer a victory in Iraq last time.

-- Wilbrod the Gnome ---

I must go down to the seas methane

2007-01-05T10:13:00.000-08:00

...to the smelly lake in the sky
All I ask is a small ship
and a star to steer her by
And the beans' kick and the wind's song
and the belly's shaking,
And an odd mist out of my space
and a grey jet breaking.

I must go down to the seas methane,
for the call of the flowing stink
Is a wild call and a clear call
that may not be denied;
And all I ask is a windy day
with Titan's clouds flying,
And the bung spray and the blown fume,
and the ship-jets crying.

I must go down to the seas methane
to the vagrant Titan life,
To the fuels gay and siren's way
where the wind's like a whiffy wife;
And all I ask is for some beano
from a gagging fellow rover,
And quiet sleep and a sweet dream
when the long rumble's done."

-- "Sea Flatus", by John Methansfield (original poem here)

Sometimes science news writers sure mangle the point of a discovery.
Take this piece on the discovery of lakes of methane on Titan. Methane is CH4, a simple hydrocarbon and a stinky gas produced by the decomposition of organic compounds-- not to be confused with crystal meth. The "point?" The methane lakes of Titan (catchy title) proves that Titan is earth-like. Yeah, I do the backstroke in my favorite methane lake every morning.

"I love the smell of methane in the morning." -- Full Metal Spacesuit

The reporter couldn't simply explain that it proves our models about the chemistry of methane on Titan, and may support some new ideas of methane production on Earth as well. This article explains it a little more.

But this misses the point: why we SHOULD care. Ever heard of giving a little background, guys, for those of us who don't subscribe to Methane Quarterly to find the latest centerfolds of sexy methane sources?

A boy's awareness of methane normally proceeds like this: one, methane in a fart is what will turn a flame blue. Two, cows burp and fart methane too. Very hilarious. Three... um. It's a long way to Titan methane from this rudimentary foundation.
The OFFICAL scientific interest in methane, chemical formula CH4, is because it has a certain odium on Earth as a greenhouse gas. Methane, aka "natural gas" also makes a handy fuel for cooking, heating. It is the simplest hydrocarbon (CH4)-- just one carbon atom with 4 hydrogen atoms around it. As a result, it is often released by any kind of chemical process breaking down larger hydrocarbons without oxygen involved.

Methane is not as stable as water, though; methane quickly gets converted to other molecules. Yet if you put carbon dioxide and hydrogen together, they will react to produce methane and water.
Earthly life, being wet and carbon-based, thus has endless methane-producing reactions. Still. Titan and methane? There are no Congressmen on Titan. Nor are there rice paddies, burping 'n' tooting cows, or human pollution to form methane.
So, physical scientists have looked at Titan and other methane hotspots in the solar system and came to this staggering conclusion--"By crikey, the Earth must pass gas without the aid of life somehow!"

Suddenly, geologists are hot to know if natural gas might be trapped in the earth's crust. That could mean a LOT more fuel to burn when petroleum has had its heyday, and maybe our gas heating bills will finally go down. This article discusses methane in the earth's mantle.

It is still the general belief that methane comes mostly from life on Earth. Rice plants have been caught exuding methane (but they didn't inhale) when young and alive. Decomposing plants produce that famous swamp gas stink, too. Bacteria make methane, too. And there always is the good old cow, a regular bacterial factory.
One scientist is exploiting the bovine methane angle by "Gobar" (cowdung) gas research in Northern India. Hmm, wonder if you get to share the livestock when you buy the stock shares?
Ah, enough gassing for now.

--Wilbrod the Gnome--

Nuttin' for Christmas

2006-12-23T18:49:00.000-08:00

-- And enjoying it! As a Christmas gift, I gave myself the gift of downsizing so I could relocate up north.

Well, I was worried about having to get rid of some items that weren't so top-quality, but the Salvation Army happily took everything I offered them, even though they did oddly forget a dining table leg and some plastic wrap. I'm phoning them tomorrow to let them know they forgot that.

I'm wondering if my table is going to be in the Salvation army store, standing on three legs if I don't call. That would be an ignoble end to one of the first pieces of furniture I ever purchased completely new-- and kept like new, too.

Now to dump-- uh, bestow various items on grateful family and friends. After all, nothing says deep care and thought like a half-used carton of toilet paper. You can always deck the halls or trees with it, you know.

Hmm, I know somebody who could use some decking.... nah. Forget that. Not worth the hassle and hiring of stepladders.

-- Wilbrod the Gnome.

White whitetails on the Internet!

2006-12-16T09:17:00.000-08:00

By now I am a jaded internet hand-- I take all photos with a grain of skepticism, even pictures of what seemed to be a perfectly normal and cute albino whitetail fawn-- especially since it came with a story attached. I checked out Snopes, which catches hoaxesand Snope wasn't sure where the picture came from. You can see the pictures there of a decidedly white fawn with red eyes and a pink nose. Another source casts doubt on the story, specifically.

It seems nobody is saying those pictures are doctored. Albino deer do exist, along with piebald and melanistic (black) whitetail deer. However, the chances of finding a fawn by accident is low, especially when you consider that there are whitetail farms in Minnesota and elsewhere in the North where capitivity can lead to inbreeding and easy discovery (and photographing) of albino fawns.

Of course, white deer do exist, but not albinos. Those deer seem like they may be genetically a very pale shade of cremello, similar to horses.

The Ghost bear aka "Spirit Bear"identified on Princess Royal Island in British Columbia, Canada was established by DNA tests and study to be actually a very pale brown-- the fur darkened slightly in summer and whitened in winter, as this cool photography shows, they're really a very pale "cinnamon" phase of black bear. During summer, some of those bears' backs can turn bright orange in response to the sun! More yellow, reddish, gray or orange bears also occur on the island along with those white and black bears.
Since we're on a roll, let's not forget white buffalo which are supposed to herald peace. The first Miracle was born in 1994 and died 2004. This present Miracle was born in 2006, on the same farm.
This link connects you to various First Nations (American Indian) legends of the White Buffalo.

It is ironic to hear this optimistic contrast to the daily war headlines. I was just reading The Sandbox this morning-- direct reporting from the soliders actually fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Maybe part of the key to peace is to get people to believe it is possible.

--Wilbrod

Great Google Moogle, where did the time go?

2006-12-15T14:56:00.000-08:00

Time to feed the blog.

When I started this humble shack of a blog, I pondered my options and chose to seek work in this area. I have now decided to quit while I'm still somewhat ahead, and move up North to save money while I apply to graduate school. If all goes well, in a few years I'll have a Ph.D., a disproportionately large head, and an actual career.

That's the nice thing about biology-- many physicists and mathematicans go supernova in sheer career brillance by age 30, but if gathering actual data counts, biologists (and chemists) have very long careers, and they get better with age, kind of like cheese or wine. Or... Hmm.

WHIIIRRRR...Brilliant cognitive leap occurs as 100,000 facts spontaneously coalesce into a network, skipping a few logical steps between A and C.

Hey, maybe our body bacteria are actually doing our thinking for us, just like Lewis Thomas proposed that our mitochondria are actually "taking us for a walk." Next time somebody complains I could use a bean-o prescription, I'll just say Shhh... my gut bacteria are thinking. I certainly know a couple of columnists who does a lot of thinking on their gut bacteria, or at least the results of all that thought.

I would like to make this longer and more profound, but I have to continue expanding my brain by some healthy sleep. Most of this news is not surprising; I've always banked on a good night's sleep rather than an all-night cram for an exam. Of course, it helps I have a good memory for facts and other information-- at the expense of being able to remember where I put my keys last.

Never clutter up your brain with unnecessary, impermanent information, is my motto. Which is why I avoid reading about the sordid doings of celebrities, the Top 10 song lists, sports, etc. Heck, some days I avoid knowing what day it is.
As Alexander pope wrote in his poem "Eloise to Abelard"--
"The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!"

Forgetting is good. Make sure you forget the right things and you'll never have problems remembering the right things. The only problem is that I sometimes forget things before I'm supposed to, and that blows.
By the way, Wilbrodog has updated his blog a lot more often lately; go romp there.

-Wilbrod-

Strapping on Seven-League Boots

2006-11-15T14:43:00.000-08:00

Today I and Wilbrodog hiked over 7 miles this morning. This is a personal record for me, and I'm a little surprised to see my legs haven't fallen to smithereens. Maybe the next time I sneeze, they will. They're already worn to nubs as it is.

But as I nurse my lone blister (good boots!) and muse on the unhealthy heat brewing in my shins, I wanted to share with you the fact that walking can make women stay smart, can slow down peripheral artery disease, lower your blood pressure (likeTai Chi does), especially if you walk on cobblestones, and of course, make your dog insanely happy.

Walking ain't enough to make you buff, ripped, and trim and keep your bones firm. As I too well know. You gotta pick it up and huff and puff a little. So in all, if you want to maximize your time and fitness, hit a gym, hire a personal trainer, take up dancing and other exercise classes. But if you have time, go slow.

It never hurts to make your feet more than just expensive parts of your body to clothe-- use them in daily life! A good hike is an experience that beats a treadmill anyday, and it's often odd what chance experiences may come your way even in a brief walk, and how moods tend to even out with the miles.

Look at this very odd cherry tree which is a short walk from my home. As the leaves drop, its cherry blossoms are blooming. Miracle? Yes, the miracle of mutation. I have had an opportunity to study this tree for the last few years. It will bloom in the fall, in the dead of the winter, and in the spring, even in the summer. This tree does know about the shortening of the days and will turn its leaves and shed them. This is not the problem. The problem is this tree in effect can't count the days of winter. It only takes a few days of cold and then a sudden warming spell for it to start flowering-- this is called a vernalization cue, meaning it is a normal signal that plants use to know spring is coming. For this tree, winter happens in mere days and then spring comes all over again! There is a new discipline studying the "neurobiology" of plants-- many substances used by plants also mimic substances used in animals' nervous systems. For example, plants use aspirin (Salicyclic acid) for their illnesses and pest attacks, too.

One would wonder, to extend the metaphor, if this tree would qualify as "brain damaged" in the world of plants. I suspect so. But it is a very cheery cherry nonetheless.

When you journey a bit further on, you may come across footprints in the beach and wonder why the dog has slid out of your sight, abandoning you, only to realize that two dogs are now with you, carrying sticks and all.

And that the extra dog carries a whole beachful of sand and mud in her fur, apparently. Yet another happy metaphor for life, I guess, but one that leaves too many muddy pawprints on my pants and too much sand on the leash.

I took 3 pictures of a tunnel from the inside, but the thing about the light at the end of the tunnel, it means your camera doesn't use the flash and thus all you see is BLACK and a smudge of murky off-white. I was not very excited to see that light, I must say.

It is far, far better to be outside the tunnel, despite all you may have heard. Behold!

Now, I won't bore you with any more hoary bromides about the blindingly obvious facts of life, but what do you think is around the bend of the trail in this picture?

Understanding Mr. Nosey

2006-11-05T09:15:00.000-08:00

As I pondered the eternal mystery of why dogs roll in disgusting gunk, I read Lyall Watson's "Jacobson's Organ and the Remarkable Nature of Smell", written in 2001, which is rather a good and lively read, if rather lacking in pictures or scratch 'n sniff bits.

Here's a sketch of a human embyro from Gray's anatomy showing the vomernonasal organ (aka Jacobson's organ) as the two openings in the developing nose (the blue is the nasal septum that will divide the nostrils and create the nose bridge.)

This is best for picking up the slow, thick molecules that don't hit your nose first off nor diffuse rapidly in air, such as musk, pheromones, and the immune system of your partner. Bloodhounds may have their extreme stamina due to equal development of the olfactory bulbs and of the vomeronasal organ, allowing the dog to switch back and forth to avoid nasal fatigue while on a trail.

I learned that you can throw a pebble into a river, have a dog go in and fetch the right one with your scent back to you. This is the foundation of "find it!" command for scent discrimination in utility dog trials, as well as obedience. Teaching a dog to pick things that have your scent on them can also make for cute magic tricks in which the dog picks the right card. Of course, you can skip the training and just daub peanut butter or bacon grease on the cards.

I cannot discuss this book in too much detail, because I think "sex" was used more often than "smell" in this book, and I'm not in the racy blog biz. He also hammers home his opinion about how smelly and stinky humans are to humans themselves and how distasteful human smell is. Well, Wilbrodog begs to disagree.

"Humans smell better when they don't bathe. Palms, face, and other areas that are extremely stinky are good to smell. MMM. People smell like food, sorta... but not in THAT way. Now when are you giving me that walk?"

The book takes time out from endless pheromone discussions to mention that the inhabitants of Madagascar, in a few thousand years of deciphering a land full of flora and fauna that are found nowhere else have managed to compile an impressive herbal lore. The author thinks that our noses guide us to what may be useful.

Ironically, when I was out on a walk with Wilbrodog, he started digging in a pile of leaves trying to eat something. It turned out to the leaves themselves. I checked, and the leaves actually have a mild, pleasant odor that reminds me slightly of peanuts or tea. For all I know, though, I am not smelling something else that is highly unpleasant to others. I confirmed that this was his target by picking up a branch and watching Wilbrodog try and eat as much of it as he could. Here's a photograph of it coated with dog drool. Since my nose said it also has leaf mold on it, I threw it out.

Native herbalists all over the world also depend on observing animal behavior for a clue to plants' properties, not just direct sampling and praying to survive. After all, if you see a cat going crazy after eating catnip, you know there's a reason for it. And in fact, catnip tea has been used as a remedy for centuries. Madagascar medicine seems less mysterious when you remember that they could observe wild animals and also feed the stuff to dogs, too. Woof!

One critter I particularly wanted to know more about is the Crested Rat (Lophiomys imhausi). Other sources describe it as being skunk-like in smell; however, according to Lyall Watson, the physiological effect is different from skunk spray. Instead of wanting to gag and vomit, you feel dry-mouthed, uneasy, and repulsed without noticing any overt smell-- suggesting it releases pheromones that act as a stimulant of some kind, activating the fear response. Dogs supposedly have died from eating Lophiomys. It is not eaten by people, period.

Back to Mr. Nosey. Why does he roll in icky leaf-laden mud that smells like the most nauseating, rotten gutter leavings in the world? Could it be for hunting down deer while disguised as dung, like wolves do? Or because it smells like perfume? Because it's a handy mudpack and anti-itch lotion? One thing is for sure, Mr. Nosey isn't rolling in it because it smells edible, or he'd be eating it, too.
Many animals roll in mud to repel insects or throw dirt on themselves, such as elephant, horses, cows, etc. After all, if you're ever looking to lay low and hide out from mosquitoes, mud and charcoal is good olfactory camoflague. Even birds will engage in dust baths and anting, which serve definite grooming purposes. Also, some animals will urinate or otherwise mark other animals as being part of their harem or troops. Dogs and other carnivores also like to roll in smelly things as well-- including skunks, live or dead.
Some dogs learn after their first skunk encounter, while others never learn. Hmm. Maybe some dogs also suffer from selective anosmia, and can only smell the great part of skunk smell.
Speaking of which, a neurobiologist wishes to disagree with the idea that humans have a poor sense of smell. We have a goodly number of olfactory genes; over 900. However, dogs have 30% more olfactory genes, and rats have 66% more. And while our nose is bigger than the great apes', allowing more surface area for olfactory uptake, it cannot begin to compare to most snout sizes of four-legged animals. So while we can certainly sniff how good or bad dinner is, we still can't track it down from a mile away.
But we can practice Kodo.

An Engine that Runs Cool Lasts Longer?

2006-11-02T15:08:00.000-08:00

It's a truism among mechanics that an engine that overheats is gonna break sooner. All engines (and computers) are made with a fan to help vent the heat.

Now, Conti et al. in Science Magazine has discovered the same may hold true for animals. The mice in this study had body temperatures 0.3 to 0.5 degree C lower than normal, due to a mutation that caused "overheating" of the hypothalmus, the body's thermostat located in the brain, hence making it misread the body temperature slightly and work harder to keep the body cool.

This recent discovery of long-lived sangfroid mice will add fuel to the continuing debate over what exactly determines aging. One debate centers on energy expenditure rate vs body size vs lifespan for a while-- an idea called"rate of living", which has been disproved by analyzing metabolic rate and lifespan in various animals. Warmblooded mammals have much higher metabolism than reptiles and fish to maintain a constant body temperature, and they also live much shorter lives. Yet, birds have higher metabolism AND live longer than mammals. Very confusing.

The mice's body temperature decrease is mild enough that in humans, it would not cause hypothermia . Indeed, humans only start shivering after their body temperature drops by around 1 degree C.

As Northerners would say, "Hoff Da! Of course we live longer because we're too frozen to wrinkle!" Not quite. the longevity effect observed in the "longevity belt" only holds true for people who grew up there, not those who move there as adults, indicating the influence may be congenital or start in childhood, long before wrinkles ever form.

Also, they're not the only ones that get cold. We all have our body temperature drop when we sleep. During a phase of sleep, we are in effect cold-blooded again as our metabolism drops. Circadian rhythm studies how this most commonly occurs around 3 AM in the morning, shortly before when our lungs are least effective. 3 AM is the cold hour when people will most commonly have their worst nightmares.

Whenever I wake up from a nightmare, it will be 3 AM and my spine will be so COLD it takes some warming up, or my heart will be pounding away. Other people may vary in their nightmare patterns, though.

This brings us back to food. If you have read the longevity belt link, you'll have noticed that Sardinia and Okinawa are both considered to be long-lived due to lower caloric intake. Caloric restriction diets in worms, mice and men seem to prolong life slightly. Now, obviously carrying around lots of lard isn't good, but why would eating very little, being hungry all the time, and being as skinny as a scarecrow make you live longer?

Researcher wondered if a changed metabolic rate, one of the effects of the caloric restriction diet, might be the key. This idea is supported by Yoda the Snell dwarf mouse, who needed a regular companion mouse to keep him warm at nights. Like all of his tribe, he had a mutation that disrupted the Pit-1 gene which is key to proper pituitary development. The pituitary controls growth and metabolism, hence Yoda's small size. A simple deficiency in growth hormone in the little mouse increases life expectancy by 25%.

Researchers already compared the gene expression of Snell dwarf mice and caloric-restricted mice, and they found 29 genes that are expressed similarly in both groups. Snell dwarf mice on a caloric restricted diet will live longer than normal mice on a caloric-restricted diet, so diet alone doesn't work. It looks like dwarves live longer in all conditions so far. Good news for gnomes!

I gotta hold my horses. Snell dwarf mice used to live really short lives. It does bring to mind the chinese saying "One disease, long life. No disease, short life." Sometimes being built to last isn't the same as being built tough. And that's where the luck of life comes in. We have tamed many diseases, nearly eradicated smallpox from the world, removed rubella from the United States thanks to the MMR vaccine, and so on. But there remains hundred of thousands of potential pathogens in the environment, and we have added thousands of new, unknown compounds to the environment since 1950.

It might be that if we all found the magic formula and germ-free rooms and hygenic chow, we would live much longer than we do right now. But, really, who wants to live in a bubble for over 100 years, even if that little wheel sure is good exercise? I'll take the cupboard any day.

Do you drink vine in foggy veather as the vaves come in?

2006-10-28T19:19:00.000-07:00

Great Jumping Jalapeno peppers! I've missed a couple days on this blog. Reality intruded. The short story is, the long fuse on my future is shortening day by day and I anticipate some fireworks to start after Halloween.

Tonight, I visited the house of a rather pale beauty with long black hair. She asked me if I liked wine, but due to her accent and a few missing fingers, I thought she asked me if I liked vegetables, which, yeah I do. So somehow I wound up with Vampire Merlot from Transylvania.

Alas, I do not drink... wine. Even this. Especially this. I may offer it as a prize for something, such as the first one to volunteer to help me move. This can be used for Halloween or just a game of spin the bottle, goth-style.

Joking aside, the juxtaposition of sulfites and the dark, foggy mists of vampire movies reminds me of something that's rarely talked about: why ocean waves smell so strong and tangy and where clouds and fog come from.

The answer is dimethylsulfide, a compound created by algae,the one-celled plants of the ocean and the mainstay of the marine food web. Dimethylsulfide is then released from the ocean into the air and then reacts with oxygen and sunlight to form sulfur aerosol compounds.

Water vapor in the air condenses around those sulfur aerosol compounds to form clouds.

(Sunset photograph copyright 2006 by Charmaine Lydon)

As clouds form and spread, sunlight levels decrease, cooling the earth. The lower sunlight levels reduces plants' ability to photosynthesize and remove carbon dioxide from the air. This causes carbon dioxide levels to rise, thus triggering further warming, if not necessarily clearer skies.

So to model global warming and climate change, we need to understand exactly how dimethylsulfide levels depend on marine life.

Until this week in Science magazine, scientists were not sure if dimethylsulfide was digested along with the algae or not. It turns out that well over 1/3 of the marine bacteria species may digest dimethylsulfide just fine, keeping the sulfur inside the food web of the oceans, rather than vaporizing into air. This partial mop-up of dimethylsulfide allows the algae to munch on sunlight without releasing too much dimethylsulfide and blocking their sun sources. This keeps tropical oceans nice and blue-green.

This is big news. Bacteria in the ocean can curb the formation of clouds? Those busy tiny one-celled bugs could potentially influence the formation of hurricanes?

Now that's fodder for a horror movie.

Is Texan Chili truly Texan?

2006-10-24T10:25:00.000-07:00

Anybody who has ever eaten at an Ethiopian restaurant will find a chili-type recipe served over pasta.

In other news: Vegetables keep your brain young.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061023/ap_on_he_me/diet_vegetables_aging

Staying in the Zone

2006-10-23T18:25:00.000-07:00

A solitary figure stalks a herd of grazing Thompson's gazelles. The wary animals suddenly wheel and gallop faster than quarter horses. Most predators would give up on seeing their prey turn into a billowing cloud of dust. Not this one. He becomes a spotted streak and overtakes one of the herd and brings it down within a few seconds.
In a few seconds, the cheetah has not only accelerated beyond the capacities of other mammals, it also took its metabolism and body temperature to the outermost limits of what it can survive-- 105 degrees Farenheit. This cheetah will remain very still for a while, recovering. Its kill is now easily stolen by other predators. In fact, kings once captured many cheetahs from the wild and used them to hunt, knowing that they could seize the prey from the normally savage and untameable cheetah while immobile.

Yet, 105 degrees farenheit is not the hottest that life can get.

Many organisms thrive at near-boiling temperatures at underseas vents, at geysers at Yellowstone, and in other places. What makes the difference? Why does the cheetah sizzle, while the archeobacteria or tubeworm does not?

In short, biochemistry. Proteins not only serve as structure, but also catalyst chemical reactions key for life. The hotter it gets, the less stable the protein is. Proteins can be destroyed by excess heat, as anybody who's ever cooked a steak knows. The protein structure is warped, the protein broken apart, and the amino acids reacted with other substances. The cheetah can take his metabolism to the maximum due to heat shock proteins, which are produced when temperatures shoot up, allowing the cell to help manage and repair itself and offset the impact of overheating.

Protein damage also can be achieved with acid or bases, of course, since proteins tend to rely on weak ionic attractions between their parts to hold their shape, and they work best in a very narrow pH zone.

Heat-loving archea have proteins very similar to ours, but reinforced with extra sulfur-bearing amino acids that bind to each other, lacing up the protein stiffly with disulfide bridges. Such straitlaced proteins are so stable they can withstand the energy of hotter fluids, but at "our" temperature zone, they might as well as be frozen for all the unbending they can perform to catalyze reactions.

However, these proteins are not necessarily damaged by cold. Neither are ours, unless we get down to freezing point, since ice expands in relation to water and can burst cells and rupture cell structure. However, life can be disrupted by cold since different proteins have different suspectibilities to cold, and it's possible for a cell to fall out of sync.

Most organisms, from plants to animals also have what are called cold-shock proteins (akin to heat shock proteins) that are released in response to temperature changes to help stablize the cell in response to cold, so the metabolism doesn't trip over suddenly inert enzymes.

This kind of explains why cells cannot be revived once dead. All cells have been descended from quadrillions of cell divisions since the first proto-cell managed to divide itself. The cells have changed, swapped substances, replaced their parts, but never once stopped and restarted again.
There is no "off switch" that does not lead to death, and there's also no "reboot button" to get things moving once again in the perfect synchrony of life.

Once you fall out of the zone of life, don't expect to get back in again.

MSN Messenger/ Hotmail Emoticons

2006-10-22T10:24:00.000-07:00

I no longer use MSN messenger anymore, but I developed some emoticons since MSN permits the user to import their own emoticon files. I found them challenging due to the very small file size allowed. If it was up to me, I'd make them bigger, more AIM emoticon-size, but ah well.

They are also usable directly in MSN and Hotmail e-mails last time I checked.

Those emoticons are exempt from the usual copyright because I decided so. Feel free to use them if you like them.

When you're feeling blue, use this bear face
Whether from cold, like this polar bear
Or because somebody's an angel in heaven
Or merely shocked into tears
Don't be green with jealousy
It never hurts to hand out a message of love
Or stick out a bearish tongue of humor
Or blush pink with pleasure
Or stick your tongue right out again to wash yourself
As you tell others to "go get them tiger!"

--Wilbrod the Gnome.

"Gnomics of Fairy Tales With Wilbrod"

2006-10-21T12:49:00.000-07:00

WILBROD the gnome sits crosslegged on a floating carpet, behind a heavy oak table in news-announcer fashion, backed by a wall showing a large talking MIRROR, various paintings of the Big Bad Wolf, The Wicked Queen, and Tom Thumb. On the table are various wands, crystal balls, garish jewelry, and seven-league boots.
The MIRROR forms the words "Gnomics of Fairy Tales" out of smoke and then goes blank.

WILBROD:
"Once upon a time there was a story called Silverhair, about a nasty, withered old crone that broke into a bears' home, vandalized it, stealing food and making herself at home. The story ends with the bears eating her up in revenge. Over time, the story changed. Silver turned into gold, age into youth, malice into charm, and the villainess into a heroine. The story is now called Goldilocks, and Goldilocks, unlike Silverhair, triumphs.

Such a transmutation has always been a mystery to the gnomic reader. This week, a forensic fable team has been dispatched to the scene to puzzle the true story out. Cindy, our ace reporter and seamstress, is there right now.

(The magic MIRROR expands and doubles as a large TV screen as zoom-in music plays. Dissolve to Cindy standing in front of the bears' cottage).

CINDY:
The forensic team is busy at work now that the bears have been tranked and taken to a local zoo. As you can see, this cottage is not a house where bears share freely. Look at those gouges tracing out the personal spaces on the floor around the table, on the table itself, and the paths to each bear's own doorway. You can see this three-bedroom cottage was a thoroughly divided house.

The bears were brusque but never savage until they saw their home invaded, not by WOMEN of any age, but a FOX, a skulking mass murderer of chickens who had put their clean cottage into chaos with porridge all over the house. The bears united to attack the fox.

The poulets down the road are even now petitioning the courts for their neighbors' release out of gratitude for their slaying the vulpine victimizer. Here comes the head of the fairy tale forensic and salvage team."

(Large, disembodied HEAD floats up)

FORENSIC HEAD:
"We completed the porridge analysis. It appears the fox had gorged on three different porridges flavored by three different sedatives never meant to be mixed together. We are satisfied by the bears' vet that there was no foul play concerning the porridges, and that in fact, they routinely cooked and ate their porridge separately to prevent drug interactions. As a result, the fox staggered and fell asleep in the baby bear's bed, never to wake up again, even when attacked by the bears."

CINDY:
"Is there any speculation as to the allegory behind this tale as of yet?"

FORENSIC HEAD:
'We have not yet identified all the allegories. "Don't cross a bear" as well as "A house divided against itself will unify against others", are two possibles.
We DO know now this story should be called The Fox and the Three Bears instead of Silverhair or Goldilocks, and that "Taste not what is not yours" is a always a good moral to remember."

CINDY:
"That is a lot of allegories to track down! What about the goat incidents at the Trolls' bridge? Will that be also investigated for further meaning?"

FORENSIC HEAD (groaning):
"I don't do goats, too gruff."

(Fade back to WILBROD)

WILBROD:
"Before we say good night, stop and think before you relate the tale of Goldilocks. Why is Goldilocks spun as a hero and allowed to escape punishment? We will discuss spin doctors and the moral erosion of storytelling next week on the newest Gnomics of Fairy Tales. Thank you for watching."

A Taoist look at Nonviolence

2006-10-19T16:48:00.000-07:00

I was just reading an article on nonviolence. Dr. Jane Hurst made me dig out my old Gandhi reading and think a bit more about this subject and the principle of nonviolent resistance in general, and from a Taoist perspective.

Jewish martyrs were recorded in 1 Maccabees. Jews died rather than worship pagan gods as required by Roman law, but not always peacefully. They rebelled quite often and it was an armed revolt against the Romans after Jesus' death, that finally led to the Jewish Diaspora from Israel and the renaming as Palestine.
I once studied the history of Sikhism.
Who could not like a monotheistic religion that says that "Women are the conscience of men?"

Guru Nanak, who started Sikhism, was able to sing of the wonders of God and love while living under the brutal rule of Moghul emperors in the 1400's, a grossly unequal world with routine brutality. Human life was valueless. People died young in war or childbirth. Rich people bought whatever or whomever they wanted. And here Guru Nanak was talking about equality. It made me understand the world of Jesus better.

Taoism holds that an excess of one thing always leads to an excess of its opposite. As Shakespeare wrote in King Henry the Fourth, Part I; "Out of this nettle, danger, we pluck this flower, safety." You can as easily change the words for "violence" and "love" and describe the teachings of Guru Nanak and Jesus.
Jesus preached peace, turning the other cheek and seeking out the kingdom of heaven, when Jews wanted badly to overthrow Roman rule. Yet, Christianity became the national religion of the Roman Empire in 313 AD!

Historians would call this irony. Taoists would call it the Way. Take the story of Gandhi and the Indians struggling against their British overlords.This is how the British came to rule India in the first place.
Indian society itself had many problems-- feudalism, casteism, poverty. Mohandas Gandhi came to India, was hailed as the leader of the independence movement, and he said no, I need to learn Indian problems first. He worked on those, and preached nonviolent disobedience called satyagraha (truth power), urging people to ignore certain laws and die for it if need be. Satyagraha could not be undertaken with doubts. He led by persuasion and many chose to follow his example. Not all.
The infamous Salt March was the incident that shook the British Empire. Many civil rights battles since have followed this example of targeting a specific unjust law designed to oppress: Rosa Parks refusing to give up seats at buses, de-segregating lunch counters.
Violence continued. Indians rioted after massacres, and tens of thousands of Indians died in the struggles which took over 20 years. Gandhi himself halted his campaign of civil disobedience at least twice.
By WWII, Gandhi had started his final disobedience campaign-- "Quit India."

This time, Gandhi said, individual acts of violence would not stop the civil disobedience movement. Hmm. He also said himself that if there was a choice between violence and cowardice, he might recommend violence. India became independent after WWII, without any organized battle, unlike the American War of Independence, which had 6 years and caused less than 8,000 deaths in battle and perhaps 20,000-25,000 deaths overall.
Yet by the time the British ceded, there were over 100,000 political prisoners to be freed, and ten of thousands dead. Nearly 1 million would die during the partition of India and Pakistian.

Nothing is as simple as it looks on the surface. Extremes will chaotically oscillate to various extremes until a new balance is found. I end with a quote from the Tao Te Chung:

9. WITHOUT EXTREMES

"The cup is easier to hold
when not filled to overflowing.

The blade is more effective
if not tempered beyond its mettle.

Gold and jade are easier to protect
if possessed in moderation.
He who seeks titles,
invites his own downfall.

The sage works quietly,
seeking neither praise nor fame;
completing what he does with natural ease,
and then retiring.
This is the way and nature of Tao."

-- Wilbrod, in the lotus position ;).

Gibbon Island, no Gibbons

2006-10-18T15:44:00.000-07:00

Gibbon island-- for some reason I don't see any gibbons here, but I sure do see a pretty waterfall. For those not in the know, this is at the National Zoo. Their Asia Trail offically opened yesterday, but it was raining all day and, I didn't really want to slog out and take pictures in sog and slush.

Thankfully today was a beautiful day, with clear, nearly cloudless blue skies by late afternoon. As you can see, some trees are starting to turn mostly fall colors by now, like this red torch of a maple near Gibbon Island. We covered gobs of zoo today. As for Wilbrodog, he got spooked by a gorilla thumping her chest and banging the glass to get him away from the glass. He decided to bluster a bit-- a woof and a growl, and I took him right out to cool his jets and tell him it is NOT his house and to be quiet and stay away.

I was a bit disappointed that the clouded leopard was difficult to photograph with the netted enclosure. I also realized most of the birds in the birdhouse were difficult to photograph with the striped glass, as well.

I'm going to refer you to Wilbrodog's blog for the low-down. I just know he's not going to mention the gorillas today, though.

Stellar Birthdays and Supernovae

2006-10-17T11:08:00.000-07:00

Today is a birthday that I didn't mail certain stuff in time for, so here is a blog devoted to October 17 instead.

In the history of American Independence October 17 was particulary important, and many other things of importance to human civilization occured, but I'm most interested in a certain year, 1604, when Johannes Kepler, trying to figure out the music of celestial spheres saw a sudden star in a constellation named Ophiuchus, the Serpent Holder, unknown to most people. Ophiuchus could be either of two guys who crossed Ceres and got divine and serpentine retribution in exchange. Or Hercules, who whacked snakes from infancy onwards. Another theory is it's Aeskulapius (Aesculapius) healing Glaucus, son of Minos after a snake bite. This confusion over the symbolism may be why this constellation is the "thirteenth" and forgotten astrological sign.

This is Kepler's original drawing, with N at the ankle indicating the location of the supernova. Its remmant, thanks to the artistry of NASA combining photographs from 3 different telescopes, remains quite a firework spectacle.

The resulting image (Note the tongue action):

Speak of a stellar illustration for The Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy.

We should also all already know that we are stardust. Many of the heavier elements are only made in supernovas.

The physics of supernova collapse is still being studied.

Kepler's supernova remmant will continue accelerating for millenia, expanding to a radius of dozens or hundred light-years wide, and helping to seed the neighborhood with heavy elements. Our earth would not exist if it was not for a similar supernova, and in fact the Stardust mission hoped to find atoms older than our sun, from bygone supernovae.

When you consider the universe is roughly 13.7 billion years old, years, let alone birthdays, are more evanescent than the blink of an eye. Yes, I know I'm still in trouble for forgetting to send a birthday card on time.

--Wilbrod

2006-10-16T16:51:00.000-07:00

The heavier you get, the longer you may live-- if you're a superheavy element, that is.

Good ol' number 118 was synthesized and scientists hope they're close to getting a superheavy element that won't instantly fall apart into radioactive decay. The reasons for manufacturing and studying Number 118 are obscure and difficult to explain.

Fortunately, I have undertaken the herculean task of boiling down the complexities of scientific thought and motive into a single technical drawing. Please contact me if you have any questions after this, or your brain has simply fried from the information overload.

Number 118, as it's code-named in the international world of chemical intrigue, is profiled to be a noble gas, being able to remain aloof from other atoms.
However, like a juggler with too many balls, heavier noble gases such as radon tend to drop a few scruples along with their electrons. In fact, you don't even want to know the names that radon gets called by the other elements. Houseowners who find radon in their house come close in general timbre, though.

So, Number 118, if it remains stable, may well find itself in compromising bonds with other elements, and thus get information extracted before he decays again. 007, we may have a job for you.

In other chemical news, soon periodic table-turners will be busy discussing the differences between bohrium and barium.

Sleep deprivation & ADHD

2006-10-15T20:28:00.000-07:00

The Gallaudet saga has put me in mind of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix which I must re-read. Meanwhile, beating the pavement once again tomorrow.

Everybody knows certain people with ADHD and more energy than should be allowed by law without a nuclear facility license and government regulation. If you've ever felt the urge to strap them to something, you might be on the right track.

Apparently, deep pressure, popularized for use in autistic therapy by Temple Grandin who found it helped soothe herself, does have its benefits for some kids with ADHD.

And of course, if you want to save money, kill two birds with a stone, and set up a treadmill connected to a generator for them so they can exercise fully and also help power the electricity in your house. Give them a video game to play while they run, and they'll burn off a few hours without noticing.

That said, if you want them to pay attention a bit more the next day, ensuring a good night's sleep without snoring may be the key.

One way to resolve this could be to play didgeridoo. The question of course, is WHAT is didgeridoo?

Ah. Instead of getting your kids hooked on phonics, get them hooked on saxophones. Or tubas. Tubas are good. Just buy earplugs for the whole neighborhood.

And speaking of the blindlingly obvious-- people who can't keep their legs still are more likely to have ADHD. The origin of restless legs is unknown, but in many cases, iron supplemention helps.

Although I doubt that kids have those following adult risk factors for restless legs syndrome other than unemployment, one hopes. Please keep your kid thin, non-smoking and unexposed to second-hand smoke, at least.

Well, tubaplaying to prevent ADHD? Hey, you only have your hearing to lose.

Next: Why the old man played knick-knack on his thumb...

--Wilbrod

2006-10-15T08:35:00.000-07:00

I talked to some of the people involved in the Gallaudet University protest yesterday while Wilbrodog enjoyed the campus visit. They seem well-organized, ready to brainstorm new ideas and stay in it for the long haul if need be. Apparently most of them got out of Sing Sing rather quickly. Here's a picture of Tim Rarus after the arrest.

If you scroll down and read the letter by the Clerc center staff, you have a rather good idea of why many people literally believe that to let Fernandes lead Gallaudet would be to destroy it. Meanwhile, Joel Achenbach has a nice rough draft on strong women.

What an unforgettable image!

2006-10-14T07:54:00.000-07:00

(Image of Tim Rarus being arrested borrowed from xanga.com)

This has been the strangest Friday the 13th so far, and one for the deaf history books.

135 people voluntarily got arrested for protesting Jane K. Fernandes (JKF)'s nomination before the student leaders called an end at 2 AM. The announcement of the arrests started 7 PM and arrests started at 9 PM. That is 5 hours of arrests, in the biting dry fall cold last night.

My fist kept going up and pumping itself in a cheer while reading the reports last night. Such courage. I have had to take a crash course in Gallaudet politics since this started, and I'm still hunting for my cliff notes. Ah, here they are.

Most of the arrested were students. Gallaudet has an enrollment of 1,100 students this year (significantly down from my era). That's over 10% of the student body at a rough guess.

Last May, soon after Fernandes was named, the faculty passed a no-confidence vote with a 70% majority. Current estimates indicate that half or more of the student body are actively in favor of or supporting the protest directly. Alumni are also a strong force. Even the National Association of the Deaf has expressed grave concern over the situation at Gallaudet.

Common sense says that no person can strongarm herself into a leadership role like this without seriously injuring the institution she is meant to lead-- LEAD, not rule.

Each action she (JKF) in fact has taken since May has actually added fuel to the protest, except for two: She resigned as provost, and Michael Moore talked to the students as the interim provost. However, that grand gesture from the administration to lend somebody to talk to the students came too late, after the pepper-spraying of students by campus security.

What are we, a plague of pestilient grasshoppers to be sprayed with Raid?

I wish she would consider this: what is she going to do at her inauguration? Be sworn in at an undisclosed location? Pepper-spray the whole university? Arrest all the students as often as possible? Have them attend classes from jail?

We will never quit.

2006-10-13T13:59:00.000-07:00

The Achenblog is all agog about the new species of mouse with large heads found on Cyprus. Other than its ability to be invisible to scientists up to now, just how did this species persist even with all the invasions of house mice and rats that kept coming ashore from ships?

Adaption. Cyprus may have specialized flora with large nuts that the foreign mice couldn't deal with, but the bighead mice could... large nuts like, maybe, coconuts? Rats might outcompete them for the nuts, but come a famine year and the mice may well do better than the rats because of their smaller size.

I'm tempted to propose the theory that these mice got so big-headed because they had to be brainy to avoid well-fed commando kitties.

Except that theory wouldn't explain the earlier discovery of another island mouse with a large head. This following is a photo of a Luzon island mouse.

Okay, we've spoken of mice today. Next post: MEN.

-- Wilbrod the Gnome.

2006-10-13T12:38:00.000-07:00

SCIENCE FRIDAY I

I was dickering with some teachers recently about the No Child Left Behind Act. You might not know this but by its standards deaf children would have to begin reading by age 3. Ridiculous! I started reading at age 4 and it never hurt me any.

Language delay is inevitable early on with blind or deaf infants, but they can catch up as time goes by with intensive and efficient teaching. Besides, think about it. Who is teaching the kids at age 3? Certainly not the school systems. What's next, taking kids away from parents unqualified to teach 3-year olds to read?

Now I just read another outrage. The No Carrot Left Behind Act.

Before you get all excited about anthocyanins, you can get red carrots in India, as well as white and purple carrots. It's not hard to BREED better carrots. You don't have to torture carrots with knives and forced UV light to make them cyan.

-- Wilbrod the Gnome
(Incidentally, the carrot photo is by Stephen Ausmus, on the web courtesy of USDA / Agricultural Research Service.)

2006-10-13T08:15:00.000-07:00

It's Friday the 13th, and I don't have normal bad luck even today. Instead of hordes of black cats streaking across my path to trip me up, I had a jumbo black one come through my window this morning. At first I thought it was a dog, but I'm not sure a NORMAL dog can stand on windowsills.

At least I'm not big kitty kibble this morning-- namely because I simply read to it from the headlines this morning and it fled in horror.

Wilbrodog took a few lessons from how I taught a blind man sign by touching and moving his hands to where they should go. Today Wilbrodog then decided to target my hands with his nose and then touch where he wanted them to go. Touch hand, touch hand, both hands to touch belly. Score! Then he went right to pointing to my mouth. "Hungry... eat/food." Sure enough, his kibble bowl was empty.

You gotta love it when an animal decides to turn the tables on the trainer, but this isn't unusual when you use clicker-based techniques.

It's decidedly a surreal morning so far. Black dogs suffer greatly from superstition, and they take longer to adopt from shelters, since people prefer "blonde fluffy." I get really annoyed with the local news stations because everytime an animal bite is reported on TV, they always use a stock still of a snarling rottweiler, even if the dog who bit was a golden retriever, for heaven's sake. Yes, most guard dog breeds are black with tan markings. So? Not all of them are trained people-masticators.

Ironically, in 2005 black dogs were considered extra-lucky in India because they help ward off Saturn. People have paid extravagnant prices in India just to get a black doggy.

In parting, I leave you with this tune cootie:

"How much is that doggy in the window?"

2006-10-12T17:22:00.000-07:00

I'm a little disappointed that that excellent article on deaf poetry didn't have enough examples of deaf poems.

Since Joel A. also suggested that I recycle my old writing, here's a poem that's been unfinished for over a decade back when I was a disillusioned collegiate smart-aleck.

What the heck, it's good enough for the internet.

Schroendinger’s cat

Began the Big Bad Wolf:
“If there's free will (bwa ha ha ha)
If Schrödinger’s cat can decide whether it’s alive or dead
Why do we all do the same thing
Get born toilet train eat sleep wake follow crowd worry die
Pack instinct, they call it
but it’s the rack instinct, every last billiard ball.

Bang, and you’re it
Can’t stop, gotta go with the break
Gotta get somewhere
Off the table ain’t in the game
Gotta go with the green
Change opinions, beliefs, identity
That ain’t free will, that’s friction”

“What of my mind? Surely you can’t deny that, I think of what I will do”

“You got big thoughts?” jeered the Big Bad Wolf
“All the better to see the inevitable hole coming up
Which by the way happens to be my handsome maw
That kitty doesn’t have a clue what dead or alive is
Even if it had the choice
But you do, you do, and so what, you’ll go and die

Oh, maybe you’ll find yourself shouting in the hole
‘Somebody open the box and see if I’m alive or dead.’
But you gotta have the free will and where’s that

Yesterday’s truth is today’s lies and forgotten tomorrow
Heroes of today are the demons of tomorrow
Ever noticed that? It’s all Brownian motion, baby
People march with the crowd or against the crowd,
Always to the same tune of the times
Like I said, it’s not pack instinct, but rack instinct

What you gonna do, you gonna do, gonna do, what you gonna do?”

(c)-Wilbrod the Gnome

By the by, does anybody have any answers to the Bad Wolf's final question?

2006-10-12T16:39:00.000-07:00

Deaf Artist Linkage.

Kb recently commented she didn't know that George Catlin, the artist of Indians, was deaf. Yes, he spent a bit more than 1/3 of his life deaf.

John Carlin is another artist who was born deaf, and he was also a poet.

Here is some artwork by Chuck Baird. I have never seen a photograph of the Technicolor Anatomy painting, but maybe somebody will find an image of it somewhere and let me know.

Enjoy!

- Wilbrod the Gnome

2006-10-12T13:36:00.000-07:00

PRISM-ER of FENG SHUI COLLEGE

I don't really want to think about what is going on right now at my alma mater, Gallaudet. My walk on memory lane goes instead to the Gallaudet Cafeteria, of all places, back when I was a freshman. There I look at a painting that Chuck Baird (I believe) painted to symbolize deaf culture, hanging up high so it is best viewed from the second floor of the cafeteria; looking at it from the first floor creates a danger of neck strain or being run-over by somebody with a tray.

The etch-a-sketch in my head tells me it had roughly 8 humans without skins whatsoever. No clothes, hair, no ears, no skins. This is the new level of nude painting.

Those humans were visible from the waist up with amazingly anatomically correct and well-drawn muscle striations. One feels that a med student could easily study over dinner just looking at the painting.

Every human was painted a different bold color straight from a child's paintbox--- purple, green, brown, blue, orange, with eyes in similar artifical and clashing colors. Hapless freshmen when they first saw this painting over a meal would visibly shudder, gag, and then turn their back on it.
But for those who had the intestinal discipline to study the painting, their paradigms would shift; for every single one of those skinless humans in the painting had something to sign to the viewer.
One major movement of the painting was the line formed by the arms of a human tapping a person bent over in prayer with his outstretched left hand while signing "Look" with his right to a glow surrounding a pair of disembodied hands in the upper left corner.
The hands could be saying "book", "open", "close", "here", or "ask". To figure this out would require scholarship above and beyond what is in the Da Vinci Code.
The mere mortals are much more easily readable, exhibiting various emotions of ectasy, startlement, anguish, and so on, with accompanying signs.
The second major message of the painting is how the painting left a gap in the middle for a conversation between an smiling adult signing "Me too" to a yellow child's open-eyed and open-mouthed question-- "Deaf you?" The expressions were perfect, and adorable. You almost forget they are skinless escapees from anatomy texts.
Over time, many freshmen started getting used to the garish colors and often would spend some time reading the painting. Many openly compared their gradual attitude change to the painting to the process of becoming comfortable with their own deafness and deaf culture.

Was that painting was placed out of sight in the cafeteria on purpose because it was so disgusting and disturbing that it could not be shown elsewhere? Because it was the only open, empty wall big enough for the painting? Because it could not be so visible to the student body elsewhere? The answer may long have been lost.

As far as I know, that painting is still hanging in the cafeteria to kill students' appetites.
Now, another art memory I have from my freshman year is of the christmas cookie party at the president's house on campus. I did not know what to expect, but the first floor, which was obviously used for receptions, with the living quarters upstairs being cordoned off, wasn't it.

The walls were coated with a medley of artworks, mostly small frames no more than 10-14 inches square, studding the walls so there was more surface covered by art than was empty.

In a small side hall, there were lots of Lincolnia, very apt since Lincoln signed the charter for Gallaudet University. Nice breath of history what with the photographs, papers, and paintings, but with irrelevant paintings enroaching somewhat. American Indian sketches and Lincoln? Looking carefully, I recognized the signature of George Catlin, a 19th century deaf artist who had travelled and sketched Indians out west. I suspected those were not his best work. I kept looking and more and more artworks seemed to be unpleasant neighbors to each other, marring the walls. Many of them were by deaf artists, but not particularly about deaf culture, merely portraits and musty relics from the 19th century.

It looked like a museum's backroom of "rejected paintings", except they were not discreetly draped.
The piece de resistence that revolted me was an exceptionally large painting of "Drowned Ophelia", as I call it--of a moaning woman in shimmery blue-green. I disliked it because of poor anatomy with extreme distortion of the limbs, arms, and head. Not to mention the plain fact that hair is not neat or straight underwater, and that the "white dress" didn't hang right either.
I automatically analyzed it as a fault of not using models rather than prurient imagination for such a large painting, then trying to cover up the mistakes by painting blue all around to make it look elegant. It failed. Amateur art gives me worse chills than the skinned humans ever did.

I wondered at that moment, exactly how it would feel to walk past that painting of Drowned Ophelia everyday on the way out of the house? Or to have so many tiny portraits coating the walls staring out at oneself. Surely a college president with a Ph.D. in psychology would be more sensitive to the effects of his environment?

My eyes found blissed relief from the horrors of heritage art in two tiny watercolors of pretty pink flowers in the asian style. I asked President Jordan about them. It turned out to be the only 2 paintings they themselves had bought-- in Hawaii, incidentally.

--Wilbrod the Gnome

2006-10-12T11:54:00.000-07:00

By the way, I should also link to some other blogs, so these bloggers will not flog me before the fo'sc'le.

ACHENBLOG It calls itself a humor blog.

An explanatory guide to this can be found at Mo's website

Rabid fanhood of the Achenblog can be found at TBG's site.

And for a Yuropean perspective, check out the bigot-fighting Superfrenchie.

For "Amazing Race" fans, sweat your hearts out or finds Fomas with Yellojkt (Don't ask ME.)

Good pointy-sciency blogging here at Bc's playhouse.

Wilbrodog is getting the leash for a flogging, so I think maybe he is indicating he wants his own blog. Only when he learns not to drool on the keyboard.

2006-10-12T10:32:00.000-07:00

Humble introductions all around. I and my talking dog routinely inhabit the Achenblog. However, after a few but quite persistent hints from other Achenbloggers that I should take my sparkle and wit somewhere else... Here I am, nailing up some content and trying to straighten out the template to my liking. Pardon the dust and cobwebs in this shabby shack of a weblog.
We do have great dreams for our blog, but dreams are all we can afford right now. I'm unfortunately an unemployed gnome at the moment, having been laid off in one of those pragmatic business decisions where the company is taking a new direction, whereas I'm apparently too short-legged to keep up. Whatever.
Time to network and shop my talents around the area and move out of my cupboard sometime soon, hopefully to a Brave New World where gnomes don't get the raspberry from prospective employers who find that I come short of their expectations in spite of my impressive resume and amazing talent.

BTW, you're welcome to snoop around while we're out, but don't steal the silver or paw the china. And hands off the Cupboard!

--Wilbrod the Gnome